Game of Thrones Episode 5 Thoughts and Feels

All I can say upon second viewing was : that was an episode.  I didn’t hate it.  Didn’t love it. That was just a brutal.

That wasn’t the penultimate episode to the biggest TV show ever.  That was a disaster movie.  That was the like the beginning of Saving Private Ryan got dumped in the middle of Return of the King.

Speaking of disasters : the showrunners decision to blaze through (pun not intended) the last two seasons in 13 episodes – as opposed to 20 – has now caused Daeny’s turn from liberator to villain seem rushed and unearned.  Thoughts while watching this episode:

• I think Varys knew exactly what he was doing : he wanted to be caught and executed so Jon could see Daeny wasn’t fit to rule.
• Why did they waste 45 seconds on Tyrion mispronouncing words in Valyrian only to have the Unsullied guards say they can speak the common tongue?  That joke is so overplayed.
• “If it weren’t for you, I never would have survived my childhood….You were all I had.” Jaime and Tyrion’s last scene together made my heart heavy and the corner of my eyes get almost teary.
• For an extremely nuanced villain (and an amazing actress), it’s kind of a shame they just had Cersei stand on a balcony for most of the season.
• I wish they’d had made up their mind on the effectiveness of the scorpions; they’re super effective and manned by expert marksmen one episode and then the next there are five times the amount but nobody can hit shit.  This isn’t nitpicking.  It’s sloppy storytelling that takes viewers with above average intelligence out of the story.
• Welp Golden Compass sucked.  Don’t think the elephants could have made a difference.  
• Of course Euron washes up on shore right where Jaime is running by.  Also Euron is an abhorrent character.
• If my least favorite character killed my favorite I might have thrown the remote through TV. Glad Jaime killed him but Euron deserved a much much worse death.  And for a show that does really good villain deaths (Jon killing that Thenn with the hammer is still the best), I’m kind of surprised Euron got away with a belly stab.  He deserved worse.  Or to not be written on the show period.
• The Hound telling Arya to go home is one of the low key best points of the series.“Do you want to be like me?  You come with me, you die here.”  Arya thanking him by calling him “Sandor” for the first time was perfect.
• I was against Clegane Bowl because it was total fan service, but that was epic. A collapsing castle tower, surrounded by flames with a dragon occasionally flying by.  Aside from Cersei awkwardly walking by them, I loved it.
• Hate them as much as you want, but Jaime and Cersei embracing each other in the map room was beautiful.
• The Wildfire going off during the destruction of the city was a nice throwback but was it really needed?
• I loved having Arya be the point of view character from the destruction on the ground, but did we really need two scenes of her getting a concussion?
• While I should be upset – and I am – my favorite character was just killed, the fact he dies embracing the woman he loves gives a small quantum of solace (underrated Bond movie).  But that’s a very interesting way to kill Cersei.
• And the “snow” Bran and Daeny saw falling on the throne in their visions turns out to be ash.

Predictions for last episode:

Don’t Care.

 

Game of Thrones Episode 4 Thoughts and Feels

As the internet quickly pointed out, a Starbucks drink appeared on Game of Thrones. I can’t think of a more proper metaphor for how sloppy the show has become.

I thought last week’s Battle of Winterfell was an often-stirring but completely anticlimactic mess (as detailed by Hitler and that Mexican guy with the great laugh) but this week’s episode drove home the fact that D & D are either bad writers when they don’t have book material and/or are in a hurry to finish the series so they can move on to pastures in a galaxy far far away.  Acting aside, this was a shitty episode of television. And it 100% falls on the writers.

For a show with only two more episodes after this, “The Last of the Starks” wasted a shit ton of time at a post-battle party before rushing through Jon telling his siblings that they’re actually his cousins (a scene that inexplicably took place off screen right as it was getting interesting) and then Euron taking down Rhaegal, Daeny starting to lose her head, and Missandei actually losing her head.   Not showing Jon tell Arya and Sansa his true lineage robbed viewers of watching two of the main characters discover the central mystery of the show. It was a slap in the face. Some other slaps / nits to pick:

• Jon not giving Ghost a proper goodbye felt like a middle finger to fans who complained about the treatment of direwolves on the show.  I get that Jon is focused on more important things but this is your dog that has been by your side for years. And you just tell Tormund to take him North.
• WTF was that Bronn scene?  I love Bronn. He’s probably the most entertaining character.  Him barging in on Jon and Tyrion and demanding Highgarden – while in character for him – just felt off.  I can’t put my finger on it. Maybe it’s because after he left, neither Jaime or Tyrion were like “well we had some good times with him, but we should probably send someone to kill him before he kills us.”
• I liked how shocking the death of Rhaegar was, but how come nobody was like “there’s a navy that wants to destroy us and it’s stationed pretty close to our headquarters.  Since you’re high up in the air, do you mind keeping an eye out just in case they try to ambush us?” Between this and the moronic battle strategy last week, it’s abundantly clear that little thought has been given to this last season.
• If they killed off Rhaeger to make the end battle more even, why then reveal that half the Unsullied and Northern troops survived the Battle of Winterfell?  I know that battle was dark but….half those groups did not survive that.
• You know how doctors get their license taken away if they perform drunk (I actually don’t know if that’s true but it happens all the time in movies)?  Well you should not be allowed to write female characters if you have arguably the most interesting character left and unarguably the one who has suffered the most throughout the show say “I’ve learned life lessons and become who I was bc I was raped and tortured by other men.”  I know what the writers were trying to say but no way in fucking hell does Sansa say “Without Littlefinger and Ramsay and the rest, I would have stayed a little bird all my life.” She’s endured and grown too much to say that.

That’s kind of arrogant of me to say “no way would a character say or do that” because this isn’t my show.  I will say I have read the books, watched this show since the beginning, and I know a thing or two about character arcs.  As egregious as that Sansa scene was, this episode made two baffling decisions regarding my favorite character : Jaime.

Let’s get the tough one out of the way first : no way in hell would Jaime sleep with Brienne.  He loves her, as his knighting showed, but not romantically. This was fan service through and through.  

What followed was even more bizarre:  Jaime seemingly chill with hanging with Brienne in Winterfell like he’s Jimmy Buffet in Margaritaville.  Then Sansa told him “I always wanted to be there when they executed your sister. Seems like I won’t get the chance” and you can see Jaime’s stomach go in a knot.  He leaves Brienne to head to Kingslanding telling Brienne that he is hateful just like his sister. Even though Jaime’s character has evolved from villain to hero with him repeatedly redeeming himself, this wasn’t entirely out of character from him.  Jaime’s fate would always be tied with Cersei’s. But the timing of him deciding to settle down with Brienne to immediately leaving to his presumed death seemed wrong.  Maybe it was the pacing (because the last few seasons are admittedly rushed), or because his motives aren’t clear:

• Is he going to kill Cersei before she can potentially burn down the city and kill millions of innocents?
• Is he going to protect her and their unborn child?

Him purposefully hurting Brienne brings to mind the actions of his brother Tyrion.  Tyrion lied and hurt Shae to push her away only to protect her.  Did Jaime do something similar because he didn’t want Brienne to follow him?

I’ll probably write a big Jaime post when the show finishes but what hurt me most about the scene is the realization that my favorite character goes through what I suffer from : neither of us believes we are worthy of love.  Jaime has done horrible things but he also suffered and been humbled. And just as a happy ending appears on the horizon, he believes deep down that he is not worthy of it. No matter what happens with Jaime, I don’t think I am going to enjoy episode 5.

Thoughts on predictions / more predictions:

• With Daeny going crazy it’s likely she’ll want to execute her top two advisers when they either hint Jon should take the Throne or try to usurp her.  Since Tyrion has plot armor and Mellisandre predicted Varys would die on Westeros, it’s not looking good for The Spider.
• Are Bran and Sansa really going to sit on the sideline for the majority of the last two episodes?
• Cleganebowl will be anticlimactic.
• Jaime kills Euron.  I’m not 100% certain why Jaime is heading South but either way, smelly pirate hooker is in his way.  And I don’t think Jaime lives much longer after that, and Brienne will end up in the Kingsguard and write in the book that Jaime fought in the Battle of Winterfell.
• There are two 79 minute episodes left.  If D & D wrap up the Cersei plot by the end of episode 5, episode 6 will be (probably) left to Jon and Tyrion dealing with Daeny and tying up loose ends.  That’s a lot of time to deal with an unpleasant plot / end of game. I’d like it if some time was left with Cersei and Jaime, but not feeling confident.

Game of Thrones Episode 3 Thoughts & Feelings

Below is what I thought while watching the episode for the first time.  Sub-bullets are my thoughts during subsequent viewings.

• Clarice van Houten listed in credits?  Melisandre making a come back?
• Why is Sansa still on the battlement?
• I know direwolves are badass, but why is Ghost with the cavalry charge?  Does Jon think so little of his pet?
• I wonder if Davos saw that lone horse and got flashbacks to Battle of Blackwater when there was the one ship carrying Wildfire?
• The Dothraki’s weapons catching fire before they charge into battle is one of the best visuals of this show.
• So that was pointless.  Even if the reasoning was to show how strong the army of the dead was by wiping out the most fearsome cavalry in the world, it was utterly pointless.
  • Vaguely racist in hindsight.  Maybe Jon was inspired by South Park’s Operation Human Shield?
• What was the point of them charging and firing the trebuchets when they didn’t know where the army of the dead was?  
• Furthermore, why are the trebuchets on the outside of Winterfell in front of the infantry?
• The first dragon swoop down was great. But maybe do that before you wipe our your entire cavalry?
• Once Edd saved Sam, I knew he was a goner.
• The dragon scenes are great.
• At first I was mad Jon went to the Godswood when he could have helped the retreating soldiers, but he knew it meant the Knight King was there and if I knew my brother was in danger, I’d 100% want to be there to protect him in lieu of saving thousands of others.
• Grey Worm breaking the bridge and signaling them to light the trench would have been cooler if the trench was something I wouldn’t have been able to jump over.
• I’m shocked Grey Worm didn’t sacrifice himself to light it but glad it gave Melisandre another moment
• The wall of fire keeping out hundreds of thousands of wights is awesome.
• “Everything you did, brought you were you are now.  Where you belong. Home.” Theon inevitably dying later in the episode is going to hurt.
• I love Sam but he should be dead now
• “We can’t beat death” “tell her that”
  • Oh shit foreshadowing.
• I don’t know how I feel about Lyanna Mormount vs zombie giant
  • On one hand it was a heroic death for a loveable character.
  • On the other hand it was really embarrassing acting.
• The Arya in library scene was the Game of Thrones version of the veolciraptors in the kitchen scene from Jurassic Park, so naturally I love it.
• But seriously why is it suddenly so quiet?  There’ a massive battle waging around them.
  • Beric’s Jesus pose while dying is less cheesy when you realizes he kept getting brought back to life so he could save Arya in this moment.
• Melisandre “What do we say to the good of death?” Arya “not today” was just perfect.
• I know Daeny had to try to burn the Night King, but good lord is she stupid.
  • Don’t have the Night King give a smug face and then be like “we’re not giving him a personality bc he’s the embodiment of death”
• Why didn’t all those reanimated wights just slaughter Jon?
• Me “oh the crypt zombies don’t have blue eyes! Maybe the theory of the dead Starks being good?” NOPE
• Daeny not realizing you shouldn’t park a dragon in a zombie field is lowkey one of the dumbest thing she’s done. But it made for a great visual with the bodies dropping from the sky.
• Of course, Jorah found her in the midst of a massive castle grounds during a huge battle.
• I thought Sansa and Tyrion were preparing to kill themselves before they could be killed and it was about to cut away before showing it and then at the end of the episode it would be revealed they had done it.  Those are the kind of thoughts you have when you watch GOTs.
• By my guess Jaime, Brienne, Pod, and Sam each been in 4 scenarios where there is zero chance they survive.
• “Theon…You’re a good man”
  • The fact I was emotional at Theon’s death is a testament of what this show can accomplish.
  • Did this take so long to give Arya time to run to the Godswood?
• This music is so fucking good.
• Aw Jorah.  I knew it was going to happen but still doesn’t make it any less rough.
• Is Bran becoming the Night King really about to happen?
• Seriously this score might top Season 6’s.
• The fact that Night’s King waits to kill Bran as if to gloat shows that there is more to him than just the personification of Death.
• Jon screaming at a dragon to kill him is appropriate
• FUCK YEAH ARYA! I don’t care if she jumped twenty feet to do it.  That was great.
• Wait the big bad is all of a sudden gone?
• The OCD in me is like “they have SO many dead bodies to bury / burn” and “someone is going to have the job of figuring out which body should go in which tomb in the crypts.”
• Ending the episode on Melisandre walking into the snow to accept her death – while hauntingly beautiful – is a strange way to end the biggest GOT episode.

 

I’ve rewatched the episode three times now, and I think it’s hard not to deem the episode a narrative and visual disappointment.  There were many portions of the episode I was literally on the edge of my chair, but the questionable cinematography decisions, distractingly inept battle tactics (keyword distracting bc anyone with an above average IQ was taken out of the story), and anticlimactic – albeit badass – disposal of the threat the show has been building to since it’s first episode, was unsatisfying for what was repeatedly promoted as the biggest battle in film/TV history.

You can subvert your audience’s expectations, but you should never insult their intelligence.  Benioff and Weies did just that multiple times this episode. They’ve long been more interested in the family and political aspects of the show in lieu of the magical and fantastical elements, and with Season 8 Episode 3 complete, they can focus on what they’ve cared about all along.  While hurtling towards a finish at a pace that makes little narrative sense but reflects their desire to move on to other projects.

Predictions status and thoughts

• Jorah and Theon were important characters, but the fact a major character didn’t die in that battle is stupefying.  I’m done predicting who will live or die any more now that they seem content to cater to fan service.
• I sure was wrong on that Bran will sacrifice him theory.  If he is on the sidelines the rest of the series, it’s really inexcusable.
• Also really wrong on Arya getting injured and staying in the North when the main forces head south to Kings Landing.
• Daeny becoming a villain is still probably going to happen.  If Sansa, Tyrion, or Varys is told Jon’s true lineage, it could probably end poorly for one or all of them.
• After the episode I was thinking about how this battle would take place in the books because each chapter is from a character’s POV.  It made me realize there is no Night King in the books and Lady Stoneheart is still present. If GRRM ever finishes the last two books I’d bet some money he waited for the show to wrap up to see how people responded to certain decisions.